The Role of Curiosity

Every new year I enjoy setting aside some time to journal about the year ahead, reflect on the closing year, set intentions for the future and visualize my desires. (Side note - I also love doing this around my birthday because I see that as more of a legitimate “new year” and significant milestone.)

A topic that has been coming up for me going into this new year is the role of curiosity in personal growth. In the past I have found setting goals frustrating. I would set my sights on an achievement outside of myself and then only feel good about myself if I succeeded at accomplishing it. This model felt rigid and unforgiving and was solely focused on what I was doing while bypassing who I was being in the process.

For me, being overly regimented makes me feel stressed. I worry about doing (or not doing) that activity and the stress that the worry creates almost negates the benefit of doing that thing itself. Plus, I value being able to listen to my body and follow its cues in the moment. So how can I create change in my life without being rigid to the point of creating restriction?

I have come to believe that key to setting intentions and creating habits or routines that work for you is curiosity. Getting curious about what isn’t working right now, and how that is making you feel. How do you want to feel instead? What changes can you make that would support that new way of feeling? Connecting to the feeling instead of just the action helps reinforce why you are choosing this new behavior. Ultimately, every decision we make is because of how we think it will make us feel so get clear on the feeling you are desiring!

Also asking yourself what season are you in right now. We all go through different seasons of life, similar to the seasons of nature. There are times where we feel energized, on purpose, motivated and expansive. This would be equivalent to summer time. Then there are also seasons where we need more rest. Maybe our creativity or motivation is waning and taking time to ourselves is what would serve us best. Our personal seasons don’t necessarily match up with nature’s seasons, and that’s okay. What are your needs for the season you are currently in?

Curiosity also comes into play with the entire mindset around creating new habits or behaviors. For me, having the mindset of “I am implementing this rule for myself because I want to see how it will make me feel” makes me much more inclined to stick to it than the mindset of “If I don’t follow this rule I made up for myself I am a failure”. Keep it light and curious. Let it be an experiment rather than the end all be all. This helps take away some of the self-criticism and guilt that may come if you have a hard time sticking to it. It also leaves space to pivot if the rules you implemented actually turn out to be more stressful than supportive.

I want to end this by reminding you that if you aren’t feeling inspired to set goals right now don’t worry, January 1st being the new year is arbitrary and you can choose to do these practices any time! The key take away is to be curious about your life and to give yourself grace. I hope that your 2025 is full of new insights, moments of pure joy and lots of self love.