The Need to Regulate Your Nervous System
When I look at the news I see a world full of disconnected, dysfunctional and dysregulated people. Dysregulated meaning that their nervous systems are not able to properly adapt to life. That they are incapable of handling themselves and responding to stress appropriately. I see a world full of people who are stuck in fear and trapped in a perpetual fight-or-flight response where they feel they need to do anything imaginable to hold on to power or where using violence actually makes sense as a means to be seen.
We MUST take care of our nervous systems in order to function in this world. When our nervous system gets stuck in fight-or-flight we become delusional and our priorities flip from connection, cooperation and joy to taking control and exerting power. Fight-or-flight mode makes us self-absorbed and takes away our compassion for others. A dysregulated nervous system is both a potential cause and a clear symptom of mental illness.
When we are young we are not taught how to regulate our nervous systems and take care of our needs. Often times our needs are not understood or addressed properly. When children scream and cry they are trying to release the tension and the emotion they feel due to being misunderstood or unmet. Big emotional releases are usually not well received and as a result children never learn how to properly manage their needs and emotions. They learn that life is not supporting them and that leads to feelings of detachment, anger and victim-mentality. Combine this with unregulated, stressed-out parents and you have a recipe for an unregulated, stressed-out, potentially dangerous adult.
Corrupt politicians, reckless gunmen, and everyone choosing to destroy the lives of others for their own benefit are all suffering from extreme dysregulation. I know that because when we are balanced, fulfilled, connected with life, connected with ourselves and awake to the beauty of the world we could never even imagine doing something so terrible. Have you heard the phrase, “hurt people hurt people”?.
One of the most radical things you can do for this world is to commit to caring for yourself. That starts with taking care of your nervous system. Your nervous system is the vehicle through which you experience the world. When our nervous system is clear we can find healthy, productive ways to meet our own needs and support others in meeting theirs. We are less likely to lash out, act erratically or harm others when we are well resourced and taken care of.
Think about this - 2 people can be in the exact same situation but have completely different experiences. Even 10, 20 or 100 people can be in the same situation but have totally different experiences. For example, when plans go awry some people become frantic, some people become anxious, some people become angry and some people stay calm. If a person makes a joke some people might find it offensive while other think its hilarious and some people might not get it at all. It all has to do with the state of our nervous system and how you interpret your experiences.
What affects the state of your nervous system:
Past conditioning
Past mental/emotional trauma
Past physical trauma
Beliefs about life/self
Fears about life
Your physical body (pain versus comfort)
Your environment
Physical needs (food, water, sleep)
Mental/Emotional needs (connection, love, safety, community)
Stress levels
How to regulate your nervous system:
Address past trauma
Get to know yourself & your beliefs about life
Address your fears
Create a supportive environment at home where you can relax and feel calm
Eat healthy, nourishing foods
Drink lots of water
Get plenty of sleep
Rest regularly
Surround yourself with good friends
Tend to your relationships
Have fun!
Laugh
Play
Meditate
Journal
Exercise
Ground - put your feet on the Earth
Spend time in nature
Talk to a therapist
Get adjusted!
Chiropractic is an instant reset for your nervous system. Continual chiropractic care helps create a stronger, more resilient foundation from which you can interact with the world. Regular care is one of the best things you can do to help keep yourself regulated and relaxed.
Alongside any/all of the outward actions to create change I encourage you to be just as radical in your efforts to keep yourself resourced and regulated. Do what you need to do to stay connected to who you want to be. Being a grounded, genuine, benevolent person is more important than being productive. Taking a mental health day because you can tell you are about to snap, or just because you know you aren’t feeling regulated, is okay. If you have to wake up early to make time to exercise, meditate and heal your nervous system then do it. If you have to cut people out of your life because they consistently put you in a bad state then do it. If you have to stop watching the news then do it. (Please do it. The news is toxic.)
When we give ourselves permission to make our well-being a priority we can start to create change in the world. I truly believe that when a person is sincerely connected to the truth of who they are they will naturally be a source of good in the world. People do awful things because they desire to feel something that they can’t figure out how to feel in a healthy way. They are trying to meet an unmet need, most likely from childhood.
Do the entire planet a favor and learn about yourself. Learn what it feels like when you are dysregulated versus when you are regulated. Figure out ways to help yourself stay resourced and full. Allow yourself time and space to dive deeper into why you feel the way you feel, do the things you do or believe the things you believe. The goal (in my opinion) is for these tools to be taught to children so that we can avoid having so many mentally ill, dysfunctional adults. But first these tools and strategies for self-regulation must become commonplace for the adults who are the examples for children. It is never too late to start a path of self-discovery. Humans are extremely adaptable. With commitment, intention, self-compassion and an open mind anyone can learn to break old limiting patterns and live a more regulated and aligned life.